先撩为敬 Let me tease you – Chapter 3

Ye Junchi usually dropped by once in a while to check on JiYuan; fortunately, he didn’t stop by tonight.

JiYuan doesn’t know where his sharp dagger went; he couldn’t find any handheld tools for self-defense at the moment. Thinking about System’s guarantee, he walked out of the room with nothing in his hands, but an unconditional trust in System’s words.

There were not many people in the palace, though he would occasionally stumbled upon patrol soldiers but they didn’t inquire too much about it.
So after a few deceiving words, JiYuan arrived at the back door he found a few days ago.
Looking at the distant dark mountain, the miasma at night was indeed thicker; from the foot of the mountain till the utmost top. Even the piece of sky above the mountain looked duller than other places.

JiYuan swallowed. Comparing to the mountain, he preferred to stay in the palace where the food and drink were delicious and he can sleep whenever he wanted.

Repeatedly preparing himself in his heart, JiYuan started to move out.
He deliberately walked in a very slow pace; hence it took a long time before he arrived at the foot of the mountain.
Shivering with cold plus feeling sorrowful in his heart, JiYuan said, “System, I think I am going to be pressed down by this mountain for 500 hundred years.”

[T/N : JiYuan was referring to the legend ‘Journey to the West’ where the Monkey King was being punished by Buddha to live under a mountain for 500 hundred years.]

System : “You think too much, no Monk Sanzang will come to save you. If you really get pressed down into the mountain, then it will be forever and won’t be able to reincarnate.”

JiYuan : “…..please speak nicely.”

He shuddered, then slowly followed a small path into the woods, towards west according to System’s advice. The gloomy forest was shrouded in a dead silence, the narrow trails started to merge together the deeper he went.
Dense leaves and branches covered sky on top of him, not sure if there were a lot of demons and ghosts hidden inside the shadow; giving a heavy pressure in people’s heart. In the mountain, the miasma lessened and turned a bit lighter.
Occasionally when JiYuan looked up, he could see the cold bright moon; embedded in the curtain of dark skies.
The moon light being blanketed by a faint mist of miasma suddenly emitted a ghostly feeling.

JiYuan’s scalp started to feel numb, he poked System while trembling, “2333, I am scared…..”

System : “You can still laugh at this moment, it seems like you are not afraid. Good luck.”

JiYuan furiously replied, “Who laughed?! I was calling your serial number!”

[T/N : The joke refer to forum post in China. This way to laugh requires typing out at least one 2, then at least two 3s to follow, depending on how funny the thing is. 233 might be “haha” and 23333333 would be “hahahahahahha.”]

System went silent for a moment then said, “Don’t be afraid, I’ll help you.”

Pausing a bit, it started chanting, “Prosperity, democracy, civilization, harmony, freedom, equality…(China Socialist core values)”

“I thank your whole family ah!”

As they walked while exchanging nonsense, JiYuan felt slightly relieved.
He squeezed out his fuzzy memories of philosophy knowledge, to debate fiercely with System regarding the philosophy of materialism and idealism; unable to stop himself from basking in the radiance of materialism.
What of demon and ghost, it’s all fake. Fake!

His self-hypnotism was disillusioned by the sound of System’s urgent reminder, “Run towards the left, something is coming!”
Following System’s warning was a stench of fishy smell. JiYuan hurriedly dodged, feeling remorseful in his heart for betraying his philosophy.

System’s tone didn’t return to its fierce tone during the debate.

“Escape from this disaster first, then you can continue your remorse if you survived. Hide in the bushes and make a roll to the left.”

JiYuan didn’t see clearly what was attacking him but he doesn’t dare to check it out. He immediately acted according to System the moment he heard the instruction and his lean body disappeared into the bushes without a shadow. When he was about to implement the second part of the instruction, he felt like he has stepped on something soft and slippery. A burst of pain suddenly pricked his ankle.

His body stiffened a bit, JiYuan can faintly guessed what happened. Not daring to pause too long, he ran towards the next bushes but his legs abruptly went soft and he knelt onto the ground with a thump. Now his entire body has gone stiff and unable to move.

System bitterly lamented, “You were bitten by a poisonous snake.”

“……. I know.”

“Now you have to face the outcome of being eaten by demonic creatures. Don’t be afraid. If you don’t OOC, I won’t destroy your soul. You can reincarnate.”

“…… thanks ah.”

There was no expression on JiYuan’s face.
If bad luck can be materialized to solid form, he would be deeply buried in it right now.

The creature that was chasing him slowly broke apart the bushes towards him.
Listening to the ground trembling from the heavy footsteps, JiYuan wrinkled his brows. He suspected that he may be pursued by a T-rex.

System nicely said, “After all, being eaten is quite something memorable. Don’t you want to see what kind of creature it is? Oh, you couldn’t move your head now right? Let me describe it for you.”

“This creature has a body looked like a bear and its claws are very sharp. But it has the head of a crow for his top part so it looked very funny. Then its eyeballs are scarlet red in color, giving people chills at their back. The beak is very sharp, just like your dagger so if it stabbed right at your heart, you would be able to take your last breath. But if this old thing is picky, then it’s not easy to handle….”

JiYuan was horrified thinking about a sharp bird beak poking holes in him. Unable to bear it anymore, he interrupted System’s words, “You talked too much! Shut up!”

System went quiet.

The stench was getting closer, causing JiYuan to shake involuntarily.
He was vaguely aware of the smell and felt more and more despaired.
It was the smell of decomposed corpses, plus some unknown fishy smell.
He doesn’t know if these big bros were picky eaters or not, or if they abstained from raw meat or live meat.

[T/N : These are not his brothers of course, in case anyone is wondering.]

The trembling from the footsteps were getting closer on the ground and it seemed like they don’t have any plan to stop. Most probably they wanted to trample the person on the ground to death, then drag him back to its nest to slowly enjoy him. Just when JiYuan was about to collapse from his nerves, System suddenly exclaimed in a low voice, “Incoming!”

Not a moment passed after System has spoken, JiYuan heard an earth-shaking shriek above his head. Then, there was a sound of something sharp piercing through a body of flesh, a clear sound to the ear. After that, something heavy fell next to JiYuan with a ‘peng’ sound. The fishy smell of blood quickly permeated the air; a bit of the warm liquid splashed on his face.

JiYuan doesn’t dare to glance with the corner of his eyes; he used his full efforts to maintain his gaze forward. That person was still the person he was familiar with, but not that look on the face. It was super scary.

Ye Junchi was dressed in black, slowly pushing some branches away as he approached nearer.
His usual three point smile disappeared into a face of coldness, and his usual narrow and lazy peach blossom eyes no longer giving a feelings of tempting gentleness. As if he walked out from a blizzard, Ye Junchi was covered with an eerily icy atmosphere from head to toe.

JiYuan swallowed, he felt like he needed a cotton-padded jacket.
The next moment, he heard that man’s deep voice sounded out, “(Filthy) Things with no eyes, dared to touch people regardless status.”

In his heart, JiYuan was crying all over the place but his expression on the outside was like a thousand years of frost. He watched with a calm and collected manner as Ye Junchi stood in front of him.

Seeing his sorry figure, Ye Junchi laughed out, though his smile did not reach his eyes.

“Tonight’s hide-and-seek game, did Yuan-er have fun?”

[T/N : -er is an endearment term.]

JiYuan get goosebumps from being called in that manner. He stammered weakly without strength, “…..devil, who permitted you to call me Yuan-er?”

Readily accepted the protest, Ye Junchi said, “Alright then, Ah Yuan. You said this dagger can cut iron like mud, it’s really the truth. A gentle turn could just beheaded this creature, the cut was smooth to the bone—- do you want to take a look?”

“….. shut up!”

Ye Junchi smiled and looked at JiYuan’s purple-colored lips, he knew he(JY) was poisoned. His eyes slowly swept over JiYuan and saw that there were two small holes at his ankle. Under JiYuan’s stunned gaze, Ye Junchi immediately leaned over and gently lifted his(JY) calf, pasting his lips on it.

Having a pair of soft and gentle lips affixed to his ankle, his sense of touch inexplicably became extremely clear. JiYuan was so shocked that even his accent has changed.

“System, h-he he he gwah….”

[T/N : JiYuan was stuttering on the word He, not to be mistaken as laughing. Gwah is just some random intelligible noise.]

System : “Helping you to suck out the poison.”

“I know…. but why did he do that ah?!”

“Probably because he saw you looking like you’re half-dead…..”

Black, poisonous blood was being sucked out by Ye Junchi while JiYuan stared at his side profile with a half-dead face. Gentle and handsome, an average normal person would most probably be completely seduced. But JiYuan was not an average normal person.

At least back in his original world, before he gave up fighting for inheritance from his loose father, he was someone with basic standard IQ that was above the threshold. Every day, he faced a group of half brothers and sisters with sincere and gentle looks, though they obviously wanted to kill him. He was cheated a few times at first but after he learned his lessons with blood, he gradually be able to keenly differentiate who is giving a fake smile.

Ye Junchi was smiling at him and yet, his smile never reach his eyes.
In his eyes were real icy frost, it was not something a counterfeit like him could compare.

JiYuan couldn’t help but sighed.

After Ye Junchi finished sucking out the poisonous blood, he slowly raised up his body and took out a handkerchief to wipe his lips. His line of sight abruptly froze at JiYuan’s chest.

“Ah Yuan, why is it your breast … seems bigger?”

JiYuan’s eyebrows twitched, a slap flew out without hesitation – naturally, it was cut off halfway. He gnashed his teeth, looking like he wanted to spew a mouthful of blood at Ye Junchi’s face.

“Shameless loafer!”

In the human world, this three words ‘Ye Jun Chi’ has two effects.
The first one was scaring children to cry while the second one was scaring children until they are afraid to cry. There was a third effect that must be mentioned.
It was quite an encouragement too — that was making cultivators grit their teeth and criticize the word ‘demon’ harshly.
Then, encouraging them to eat more rice; earnestly practicing their cultivation for the sake of killing the devil.

Though it can be seen that Ye Junchi’s temper was not as horrifying as mentioned in the rumors, nor his moves were earth-shaking, he was no Buddha.
The ice beauty has repeatedly disobedient to him, and even climbed up the mountain in the middle of the night seeking death. Ye Junchi’s unmoving face means he was really angry. Then he unexpectedly grinned, leaning over to hold JiYuan in his arms.

The original owner was able to cross-dress successfully all thanks to his slender body. Even when Ye Junchi held him in his arms, he didn’t doubt anything other than feeling that he need to feed JiYuan with more meat to fatten him up as his bones was too sharp.

JiYuan quivered when he saw Ye Junchi’s smile. Struggling bitterly, he looked for System, “He gwah….”

System : “Speak human language.”

“I said what the hell is he doing, suddenly breaking into a smile making me feeling cold all over my body.”

JiYuan suddenly remembered a thing after his sad words. He quickly asked, “What about the task?”

“It was a success, just have to wait for the next one.”

Having no alternative but to stop thinking about the tasks and a night of torment, JiYuan started to feel sleepy.
Just that, he really don’t dare to sleep; nesting in the arms of someone with unknown bottom limit.

The back mountain was not that far from the palace so Ye Junchi brought JiYuan back riding the wind. Using lesser than half the stick of an incense, they returned to the court JiYuan usually stayed in. He threw JiYuan on the bed when they entered the room.

JiYuan was very drowsy, his eyes couldn’t be opened anymore when he felt the warm embrace from the bed.

It was currently summer time so JiYuan didn’t wear much clothing. His clothes was torn by the branches from the time he ran in the forest. There wasn’t any time to think about it earlier but at the moment, under the faint candle light, delicate white skin was revealed. Just like a good warm jade, it looked comfortable and not bad when touched. His thin slender waist can be vaguely seen having a curve under the tattered clothing. It was not a woman’s usual provoking delicateness, but there were extra smooth lines on it. As for his big and strange chest….

Ye Junchi muttered to himself irresolutely. He didn’t vulgarly try to cop a feel but just revealed a creepy laugh. Rubbing JiYuan’s hair which was still containing some broken leaves within, he softly said, “I don’t have the patience to play with you anymore.”

System who was secretly observing the situation shuddered.

The author has something to say:
Secretly observing, I sold a ‘Moe’ (⊙v⊙)

#TheTranslatorWantSomeAction
#IAmABananaTranslation
#AppreciateComments
#IMeanPleaseCommentPlease
#YJCxJY

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